Monday, April 21, 2014

In The News: Basketball Star Goes Fishing, World Freaks Out


Not everyone is an NBA fan, so let me give you the 30 second recap: the Indiana Pacers have had an incredible season, gaining the #1 seed in the East over the defending champion Miami Heat (whether you follow sports or not, you know Lebron James). The problem is, the Pacers suffered a late season swoon, ending the season on a sour note, and then to top it off lost Game 1 of their first round playoff series to the #8 seeded Atlanta Hawks 101-83.

What does this have to with anything? Well, to recover from the disappointment of Game 1, and the crushing expectations placed on him, star guard Paul George went fishing. And the world freaked out.



Cue the idiotic web sites like the almost universally detested Bleacher Report mocking George for fishing during his down time after what had to be a difficult loss. You know who else has found fishing to be a regenerative and contemplative past time? Pretty much every American president:


Did Franklin D. Roosevelt allow the Nazis to overrun Europe because he was too distracted fishing? Find out by clicking this special Bleacher Report exposé "Top 10 World Crises Caused By FDR's Angling Addiction!"


Oh, and fishing has been the preferred past time of many world champion athletes:


Babe Ruth keeping his body in perfect condition with some fishing. Had he not fished, he might have hit far more than his paltry 714 lifetime home runs. It would not be hyperbolic to say that fishing RUINED BABE RUTH'S CAREER!



Ted Williams and Sam Snead were noted anglers who often packed their tackle on the road; fishing REALLY hurt their careers. Snead only won 82 PGA events including 7 majors, and Williams only had a lifetime on-base percentage of .482. If they hadn't been such GLORY BOYS wasting their time fishing, they might have made something of themselves!


Hey, if Presidents Roosevelt or Hoover felt that fishing helped them to recover from the stress of keeping the world economy from completely imploding and causing universal economic collapse, I think it just might be OK for Paul George to partake in a little fishing to recover from a basketball game. But that would require us to think of professional athletes as human beings, rather than some mythical creation from the mind of the Gregggggg Easterbrooks of the world who, upon losing, skip eating and sleeping to breakdown film or shoot an extra 1000 jumpers following a loss such as this.

The Pacers (and Paul George) may very well right the ship and go on a long playoff run. They may also tank and lose to the Hawks in the first round. The only thing that is safe to say is that neither scenario will be remotely impacted by Paul George fishing between games.

-- Dr. Todd

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